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  1. #51
    It's all about mid-table...
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Look after yur anus and yur anus ul look afta yow.


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  3. #52
    Senior Doom Monger
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bryn Gunn View Post
    Aloe Vera ones? A Block lad lol, what’s wrong with tracing paper bog roll like back in the day?
    Which side of the IZAL did you use?
    The shiny side where nothing stuck, and it had zero absorbency, or the rough side which also had zero absorbency, but did feel like you were wiping with a bastard file.


  4. #53
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Used to sit in the outside bog hoping that the newspaper square next in line on the nail was one of the sports page to give you something to read in the light of the paraffin lamp.


  5. #54

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Alf-aSemedoBlueJeans&Chinos View Post
    What's everyone's favourite alternate method of wiping? My go-to order is:

    1) Kitchen Roll
    2) Newspaper
    3) Socks
    4) Dock leaves
    5) Recruitment recommendation list.
    Indian bus ticket.


  6. #55
    The Foam Hand
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Captain Sinister View Post
    Which side of the IZAL did you use?
    The shiny side where nothing stuck, and it had zero absorbency, or the rough side which also had zero absorbency, but did feel like you were wiping with a bastard file.
    Like you say, it didn’t matter which side you used, all it did was smear shit over your bum cheeks.


  7. #56
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Captain Sinister View Post
    Which side of the IZAL did you use?
    The shiny side where nothing stuck, and it had zero absorbency, or the rough side which also had zero absorbency, but did feel like you were wiping with a bastard file.
    Both,

    Sent from my moto g(6) play using Tapatalk


  8. #57
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    If you are self isolating or on your own or whatever they want to call it, does it really matter if you don't wipe your arse.

    Sent from my moto g(6) play using Tapatalk


  9. #58
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lefkasman View Post
    If you are self isolating or on your own or whatever they want to call it, does it really matter if you don't wipe your arse.

    Sent from my moto g(6) play using Tapatalk
    It's a slippery slope.


  10. #59

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?


  11. #60

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?




  12. #61
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    I think if we did run out I'd just put the shower on and wash my arse instead. Which is probably better anyway...


  13. #62

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Francis Benali (on loan) View Post
    OK yah.
    Fuck off you patronising bitch and do something useful.


  14. #63
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    We have five. We'll probably run out.

    Don't care, we have a shower. I'm more concerned about the food supply chain failing, and so we've got enough to last a few weeks if we need to ration tightly.

    .k I m
    I m u mm

  15. #64

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Alf-aSemedoBlueJeans&Chinos View Post
    2. Both white.
    Other colours are available https://www.redcandy.co.uk/black-toi...SABEgKSdPD_BwE


  16. #65
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?


  17. #66
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Iíve got loads, she buys it bulk from Costco

    Didnít stop me buying the last roll in Sainsburys today though, I pushed a little old woman out of the way to get it as well


  18. #67
    Forum Tactician
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    I do the operation loo roll charity thing at work. £70 for a fucking lorry load. Sometimes get kitchen roll, hand sanitizer & washing up liquid on top.

    Words out Im up to my neck in it, so Ive organised extra security.


  19. #68
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie Yates View Post
    I’ve got loads, she buys it bulk from Costco

    Didn’t stop me buying the last roll in Sainsburys today though, I pushed a little old woman out of the way to get it as well
    I did similar in Bulwell Morrissons a few years back with a pork pie at Christmas. Without realising the rest of the family were elsewhere in the shop.

    Carnage ensued & my ban hasn't yet been officially lifted.


  20. #69
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Actually was off a couple of weeks ago and did a big shop before any of this madness started so already had a 9 pack. Run out of baby wipes though.


  21. #70
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    And to think of all the bog rolls we wasted at the football years ago throwing them on the pitch.
    The older ones will remember.

    Sent from my moto g(6) play using Tapatalk


  22. #71
    The Foam Hand
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie Yates View Post
    I’ve got loads, she buys it bulk from Costco

    Didn’t stop me buying the last roll in Sainsburys today though, I pushed a little old woman out of the way to get it as well
    All you need to do is cough loudly and people clear the shopping aisle within three seconds.


  23. #72
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bryn Gunn View Post
    All you need to do is cough loudly and people clear the shopping aisle within three seconds.
    & shout “I’ve had this fucking cough since I got back from Milan”


  24. #73
    Sexual Tyrannosaurus
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    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    Quote Originally Posted by Eddie Yates View Post
    & shout ďIíve had this fucking cough since I got back from WuhanĒ
    FTFY

    we're on 7 and a bit. If it gets worse I'll have to break into the wanking stash. I won't be happy.

    "Ive only met Andy....last week actually and can confirm he is in 2nd place in sexiest fucker on here stakes." -Barry

  25. #74

    Default Re: How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?

    I was going to say that 6 months ago you could never have imagined us all discussing toilet rolls but we'd have almost certainly got round to it eventually anyway!


  26. #75
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    Default How many loo rolls do you have in your home right now?



    'Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings' - Salvador Dali 1904-1989

    I think 'odd' is a good thing. Oddness shows originality, uniqueness and a desire to be different from the masses. Oddness is, maybe, only deemed 'odd' by the majority who are considered less odd but only by their own blinkered observations and understanding. Oddness should never be criticised but be encouraged to nurture, develop individualism and to explore the mind rather than conform to expectation and 'normality'. Many of the world's greatest works of art and prose were born from those minds many considered to be 'odd'.
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