Welcome to the LTLF Forest Forum.
Results 1 to 19 of 19

Thread: Liverpool Jokes

      
  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Nottingham
    Posts
    4,548

    Default Liverpool Jokes

    "Just bought a Liverpool advent calender,f**king typical all the Windows are boarded up and some bastard has nicked the chocolate"

    Has anyone got anyother Liverpool jokes

    Similar Threads:

  2. # ADS
    Circuit advertisement
    Join Date
    Always
    Location
    Advertising world
    Posts
    Many

  3. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    303

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Liverpool?


  4. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Nottingham
    Posts
    4,548

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Ok Liverpool FC


  5. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    236

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    I was driving though Liverpool once and got a puncture. I got out of the car & started to remove the tyre. Just as i manage to get it off a bloke comes running-up, jumps into the car and starts pulling out my stereo. I get up to drag him out of the car & while shouting at him “what do you think you are doing”. To which he replies “Hey mate if your having the tyres, I'm having the fucking stereo”.


  6. #5

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    I still remember Tarby on Fantasy Football.

    Skinner and Baddiel presented him with one of those small gold-efect die-cast models of Anfield (you could get a good few Prem stadia in that style back in the day) and he was chuffed to bits. He turned it round in his hands and pointed to the one side of the ground, saying

    "There used to be a little gold car there too but someone nicked it"



    Fair play to the Scouse bastard, I did have to chuckle.


  7. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    1,387

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    [img width=400 height=170]http://i17.tinypic.com/815p255.png[/img]


  8. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    1,387

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    [img width=238 height=330]http://i189.photobucket.com/albums/z178/ashdaboy91/BurnLpoolBadge.gif[/img]


  9. #8

  10. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    225

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Heres a few.......


    Q: What's is the differance between Pamela Anderson and the Liverpool goal?
    A: Pam's only got two tits in front of her


    Newsflash: Thieves broke into the home of a Liverpool fan and stole two books. "The thing that upsets me", he said "is that I hadn't finished colouring them in yet!"

    Q: Why do Sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
    A: So they ain't mistaken fur a Liverpudlian women.


    Two boys are playing football in the park when one of them is attacked by a rottweiler. Thinking quickly, his friend rips a plank of wood from a fence, forces it into the dog's collar and twists it, breaking the dog's neck. All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. He writes, "Manchester City fan saves friend from vicious animal." The boy interrupts: "But I'm not a City fan." The reporter starts again: "Manchester United fan saves friend from horrific attack." The boy interrupts again: "I'm not a United fan either." The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then?" "Liverpool," replies the boy. So the reporter starts again: "Scouse b*****d kills family pet"


    Q: What do you call a Liverpool fan in a suit?
    A: The accused




  11. #10

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Young Iraqi lads signs pro contract at liverpool.........scores a hat-trick on his debut and gets carried off shoulder high! He rings home all excited to tell his mum the good news and asks how the family are...."how are we?" says his mum...."the house has been bombed, your dads been shot, your sisters been raped and ive been mugged at gunpoint....why the fuck did u bring us to liverpool?

    sorry bit shit and old i spose


  12. #11
    Rice IV
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    37,481

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Quote Originally Posted by MikeyJ25
    Q: What do you call a Liverpool fan in a suit?
    A: The accused
    I'm a big fan of the one!

    Talk to me, Goose.

  13. #12
    winnits
    Guest

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    The alternative answer is "A bailiff"


  14. #13
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    carlton, nottm
    Posts
    1,930

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    I received a commemorative Liverpool at Hillsborough clock the other day,
    its already broke and the arrows are stuck on 9:30




  15. #14
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    168

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Quote Originally Posted by Joebiline
    I received* a commemorative Liverpool at Hillsborough clock the other day,
    its already broke and the arrows are stuck on 9:30

    I must be thick. I' don't get it.
    Have a feeling I'm not going to like it anyway.


  16. #15
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    carlton, nottm
    Posts
    1,930

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Quote Originally Posted by lif3mouldnn
    I must be thick. I' don't get it.
    Have a feeling I'm not going to like it anyway.
    on a clock what numbers do the arrows point to at 9:30


  17. #16
    Marthur your soul is mine
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    455

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    What do you call a scouser on a bike?


    A thief!

    Fucck em all


  18. #17

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    I lol'd at B Block's effort mostly.When I make time,I'll scour and steal some gems from the Man U boards and transfer him here


  19. #18
    Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    17,613

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    What do you call a Liverpool fan in a four bedroomed house







    Burglar


  20. #19
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    732

    Default Re: Liverpool Jokes

    Quote Originally Posted by cenobite
    What do you call a scouser on a bike?
    Given the Rhys Jones case, I would suggest that drive by shooter would be more appropriate. :P


 

 

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •